"And I will cause hostility between you and the woman, and between your offspring and her offspring. He will strike your head, and you will strike his heel." Genesis 3: 11
"Alright then! The Lord Himself will give you a sign. Look, the virgin will conceive a child! She will give birth to a son and will call Him Immanuel (which means 'God is with us')" Isaiah 7: 14
"My mercy and justice are coming soon. My salvation is on the way. My strong arm will bring justice to the nations. All the distant lands will look to me and wait in hope for my powerful arm." Isaiah 51: 5
"In the beginning, the Word already existed. The Word was with God and the Word was God. He existed in the beginning with God, and nothing was created except through Him... So the Word became human and made His home among us. He was full of unfailing love and faithfulness. And we have seen his glory, the glory of the Father's one and only son." John 1: 1-3, 14
"And while they were there, the time came for her baby to be born,. She gave birth to her first child, a son. She wrapped Him snugly in strips of cloth and laid Him in a manger, because there was no lodging available for them." Luke 2: 6 - 7
"Then Simeon blessed them, and he said to Mary, the baby's mother, 'This child is destined to cause many in Israel to fall, but He will be a joy to many others. He has been sent as a sign from God, but many will oppose Him. As a result, the deepest thoughts of many hearts will be revealed. And a sword will pierce your very soul." Luke 2: 34 - 35
"But He was pierced for our rebellion, crushed for our sins. He was beaten so we could be whole, He was whipped so we could be healed. All of us, like sheep, have strayed away. We have left God's path to follow our own. Yet the Lord laid on Him the sins of us all." Isaiah 53: 5 - 6
" 'Men of Galilee,' they said, 'why are you standing here staring into Heaven? Jesus has been taken from you into heaven, but someday He will return from heaven in the same way you saw Him go." Acts 1: 11
" 'Look, I am coming soon, bringing my reward with me to repay all people according to their deeds. I am the Alpha and the Omega, the First and the Last, the Beginning and the End." Revelation 22: 12 - 13
The Incarnation... it is the great mystery of the ages.
The God become Man. The God-Man Babe who was the God-Man Sacrifice who is the Priest King of Heaven.
Seriously, it blows my mind.
That God, the Creator of Heaven and Earth should stoop down to become a human. To be born as a squalling little baby, in a stable, in a backwater town of a backwater region of the Roman Empire.
In order to save me and anyone else who accepts it from Hell.
Wow. Wow. Wow. WOW! And have I mentioned: "WOW!!"?
The assistant minister said it last night. He said it clear for all to hear. That first Christmas was the Dawn of a new Day of Grace.
And it was true.
That First Christmas began the life that fulfilled promises that reached back into the mists of time.
It was the day on which GOD lovingly condescended to become one of us, His broken, defiled creation, so that He could reach us and save us because He knew we could not reach Him or save ourselves.
It was a life of sacrifice right from the start.
The one child who could choose where He wanted to be born and who His family would be, chose a carpenter as His father, a virgin as His mother, a stable as His birthing place and a manger as His first resting place.
The only words I can think are "this blows my mind".
Because I know I don't deserve it.
I don't deserve that kind of Love and Grace.
And I have yet to meet someone who can convince me that they do.
But that's the Miracle of Grace, the Gift of Christmas.
We don't deserve God's love. We don't deserve His Grace. We don't deserve His Mercy. But He stooped down and gives it to us anyway.
No wonder He is Exalted.
No wonder the angels sang His praises, and the magi travelled far to meet Him.
What a mind-boggling, brain-bending, heart stopping truth.
So, today, Christmas Day, I give whole hearted thanks for that Child, for that Man. Because He is my Everything, and I can't do it without Him.
Happy Remembrance of Jesus' Birth Day everyone.
Wednesday, 25 December 2013
Tuesday, 24 December 2013
Thanksgiving #2 - Family
My heart is extremely heavy this Christmas Eve.
There is a weight that sits on it, pressing down. There have been moments when I have found it hard to breathe through the pain. And I have been driven to my knees, both metaphorically and literally.
And, despite the pain, or perhaps because of the pain, I realize how grateful I am for my parents and sisters.
This world is so broken. I just can't avoid it. Not this year, and I doubt I will ever be able to again.
I sit in church and a friend talks about the brother who has just had a major row with his family.
I scroll down my newsfeed, and I see the posts from the girl whose mother died only a month ago and whose boyfriend left her pregnant. She mourns the loss of both those people, and knows that Christmas just won't be the same this year.
I sit at my kitchen table writing and hear my parents tell us that our uncle and his wife have split up. That makes the third couple out of five from that generation to break up... and the second this year.
I walk outside and hear the neighbours arguing. An affair, a heartbreak, a desire to end the marriage.
I think of people around the world on Christmas, and can think only of those being sexually abused for money, meeting in secret to worship, dying by the thousands from hunger and starvation.
My heart is thudding in my chest. It hurts. It hurts so badly.
Then I look around my home. At my parents, at my sisters, and my heart whispers thank you.
Thank you that my parents are still together, still love each other.
Thank you that I can count my sisters among my best friends.
Thank you that my family is still together, and unlikely to break apart.
Because it's not through anything we've done. We've said no spell, hit upon no secret for the perfect home.
We argue, we disrespect, we hurt each other. It all happens.
But we are united by something deeper than our own sinfulness. The Love of God and the shared knowledge and understanding of what Christmas is all about. The God-become-Man who brought us Grace beyond measure.
He is at the centre of our lives, and He holds us all together.
And I am so very, very grateful.
There is a weight that sits on it, pressing down. There have been moments when I have found it hard to breathe through the pain. And I have been driven to my knees, both metaphorically and literally.
And, despite the pain, or perhaps because of the pain, I realize how grateful I am for my parents and sisters.
This world is so broken. I just can't avoid it. Not this year, and I doubt I will ever be able to again.
I sit in church and a friend talks about the brother who has just had a major row with his family.
I scroll down my newsfeed, and I see the posts from the girl whose mother died only a month ago and whose boyfriend left her pregnant. She mourns the loss of both those people, and knows that Christmas just won't be the same this year.
I sit at my kitchen table writing and hear my parents tell us that our uncle and his wife have split up. That makes the third couple out of five from that generation to break up... and the second this year.
I walk outside and hear the neighbours arguing. An affair, a heartbreak, a desire to end the marriage.
I think of people around the world on Christmas, and can think only of those being sexually abused for money, meeting in secret to worship, dying by the thousands from hunger and starvation.
My heart is thudding in my chest. It hurts. It hurts so badly.
Then I look around my home. At my parents, at my sisters, and my heart whispers thank you.
Thank you that my parents are still together, still love each other.
Thank you that I can count my sisters among my best friends.
Thank you that my family is still together, and unlikely to break apart.
Because it's not through anything we've done. We've said no spell, hit upon no secret for the perfect home.
We argue, we disrespect, we hurt each other. It all happens.
But we are united by something deeper than our own sinfulness. The Love of God and the shared knowledge and understanding of what Christmas is all about. The God-become-Man who brought us Grace beyond measure.
He is at the centre of our lives, and He holds us all together.
And I am so very, very grateful.
Sunday, 22 December 2013
Thanksgiving #4 - TV shows
Hey everyone,
So sorry that I haven't really been writing here. I've been spending the past few weeks as far away as possible from social media. I really needed the break.
But, I'm back, and I'll be trying to write one everyday between now and Christmas (all 4 days of them).
This may seem slightly strange, but today I am thanking God for TV shows. Over the past couple of weeks, I've spent a lot of time watching through some awesome scifi shows (yes, I am a nerd!). And I have been absolutely loving it.
The stories have been firing my imaginations, giving me questions to think about and have been allowing me to relax. So, I thank God for them and for the creativity He has blessed us with to create such shows.
So sorry that I haven't really been writing here. I've been spending the past few weeks as far away as possible from social media. I really needed the break.
But, I'm back, and I'll be trying to write one everyday between now and Christmas (all 4 days of them).
This may seem slightly strange, but today I am thanking God for TV shows. Over the past couple of weeks, I've spent a lot of time watching through some awesome scifi shows (yes, I am a nerd!). And I have been absolutely loving it.
The stories have been firing my imaginations, giving me questions to think about and have been allowing me to relax. So, I thank God for them and for the creativity He has blessed us with to create such shows.
Friday, 13 December 2013
Thanksgiving #13 - The Simple and Unexpected
We were strolling down the main path of Hyde Park, chatting about the trees and bagpipes, when she exclaimed "I love this guy!"
Startled, I looked around, not sure whom she was talking about. Then I saw him too.
He stood on the path holding a loop of string attached to two sticks. He dipped the string in a bucket and pulled it up. Moving with ease and confidence, he stretched open the string, using the sticks. The wind caught the liquid suspended in the loop and blew it out. It formed a bubble, a translucent sheet of dancing colour.
He moved to place this broad billowing sheet over the head of a young boy who whimpered and pressed closer to the woman beside him. She and the man chuckled and the man re-dipped the string in the bucket.
Again, a billowing tunnel of colour formed in the air. He took it over to a young girl who stuck her head into it, giggling the way only a child can. Her siblings, who stood beside her, giggled too.
Then the man grasped who looked almost like a solid plastic net out of a shallow bowl and twirled it through the air.
Hundreds of paper thin spheres of colour came bursting out. Caught by the wind, they danced along merrily as a little boy laughed and chased them, hands outstretched to catch them.
Soon, we moved away, having laughed and been delighted. I murmured to my friend, feeling a deep contentment, "that'll be appearing on my blog". She asked why and I answered.
It's sometimes, always, the simple things in life that bring us the most joy. So often, we over-complicate life, we look for joy in the complex things. And yet... it's the simple things - bubbles on the wind in the park, the laugh of a child, an avenue of trees - that bring us the sweetest moments of joy. That curve our lips in the softest of smiles and bring a glow to our eyes.
She smiled her agreement "and the surprising things, the unexpected things."
I nodded and we continued on our walk, chatting easily until we reached our destination.
The moment we stepped through the door a hush descended. Not an awkward hush, not even a companionable hush, but a reverent hush.
The towering ceiling supported by carved dark wood rafters, sandstone walls that glowed in the yellow sunlight, stain glass windows with familiar scenes - the maji, the babe and other storie s from the incredible life of that one pure man who lived and died 2000 and years ago, and who continues to live today.
We sat, two young woman who love the Lord, on the pews of that cathedral, our eyes caught up by the beauty of the building and our minds and hearts wondering at, worshipping, the glory and graciousness of the God the building was built to glorify.
The silence was not suffocating, it was releasing. We sat, our own thoughts wondering, occasionally whispering to each other, sharing some thought to ponder.
How incredible is our God, we both agreed.
And even after we'd left the building, it took a few minutes for the us to stop whispering and speak in normal voices. We strolled around the city, sipping cool drinks and trying not to feel the heat. We chatted, mostly theology, sometimes life, until I boarded my train.
We hugged good-bye and I couldn't help but think how grateful I am. How thank I am for the simple and unexpected, and, at that moment, most of all, the friend who was vanishing up the steps to her own platform.
An, as I sat down and started to write, I realized writing was no longer a struggle. I wasn't feeling like I had to rack my brains in search of a thanksgiving point to write on.
God's grace had, once again, found me, through no work of my own, and had left me silenced, but brimming with joy and thanksgiving.
And the words, they almost wrote themselves.
Thank you, Father. My heart needed this little gift of yours!
Startled, I looked around, not sure whom she was talking about. Then I saw him too.
He stood on the path holding a loop of string attached to two sticks. He dipped the string in a bucket and pulled it up. Moving with ease and confidence, he stretched open the string, using the sticks. The wind caught the liquid suspended in the loop and blew it out. It formed a bubble, a translucent sheet of dancing colour.
He moved to place this broad billowing sheet over the head of a young boy who whimpered and pressed closer to the woman beside him. She and the man chuckled and the man re-dipped the string in the bucket.
Again, a billowing tunnel of colour formed in the air. He took it over to a young girl who stuck her head into it, giggling the way only a child can. Her siblings, who stood beside her, giggled too.
Then the man grasped who looked almost like a solid plastic net out of a shallow bowl and twirled it through the air.
Hundreds of paper thin spheres of colour came bursting out. Caught by the wind, they danced along merrily as a little boy laughed and chased them, hands outstretched to catch them.
Soon, we moved away, having laughed and been delighted. I murmured to my friend, feeling a deep contentment, "that'll be appearing on my blog". She asked why and I answered.
It's sometimes, always, the simple things in life that bring us the most joy. So often, we over-complicate life, we look for joy in the complex things. And yet... it's the simple things - bubbles on the wind in the park, the laugh of a child, an avenue of trees - that bring us the sweetest moments of joy. That curve our lips in the softest of smiles and bring a glow to our eyes.
She smiled her agreement "and the surprising things, the unexpected things."
I nodded and we continued on our walk, chatting easily until we reached our destination.
The moment we stepped through the door a hush descended. Not an awkward hush, not even a companionable hush, but a reverent hush.
The towering ceiling supported by carved dark wood rafters, sandstone walls that glowed in the yellow sunlight, stain glass windows with familiar scenes - the maji, the babe and other storie s from the incredible life of that one pure man who lived and died 2000 and years ago, and who continues to live today.
We sat, two young woman who love the Lord, on the pews of that cathedral, our eyes caught up by the beauty of the building and our minds and hearts wondering at, worshipping, the glory and graciousness of the God the building was built to glorify.
The silence was not suffocating, it was releasing. We sat, our own thoughts wondering, occasionally whispering to each other, sharing some thought to ponder.
How incredible is our God, we both agreed.
And even after we'd left the building, it took a few minutes for the us to stop whispering and speak in normal voices. We strolled around the city, sipping cool drinks and trying not to feel the heat. We chatted, mostly theology, sometimes life, until I boarded my train.
We hugged good-bye and I couldn't help but think how grateful I am. How thank I am for the simple and unexpected, and, at that moment, most of all, the friend who was vanishing up the steps to her own platform.
An, as I sat down and started to write, I realized writing was no longer a struggle. I wasn't feeling like I had to rack my brains in search of a thanksgiving point to write on.
God's grace had, once again, found me, through no work of my own, and had left me silenced, but brimming with joy and thanksgiving.
And the words, they almost wrote themselves.
Thank you, Father. My heart needed this little gift of yours!
Friday, 22 November 2013
A Special Guest (and then Thanksgiving point #34)
Ummm, well,
Hello *taps on microphone* Is this thing on? You might be thinking. .
"wait this isn't actually our normal amazing author!? Who is this
deviously charming but ugly imposer? Have you kidnapped our usual author for
use in your dastardly plans to take over the southern hemisphere?!"
The answers to your questions are: “Yes”, “Explained later”,
and “Absolutely”.
Well 'ello, My name is *Actual name blocked for due to US
gov shutdown* But you can call me Scooper. See me, and the author of this blog, are good
friends (at least I hope so, but after this post we shall see ) But the thing is, me and author have only actually had three conversations in
real life. In fact, the first time I had the pleasure of conversing with that
wonderful creature, I killed her.
Let’s face it, she had it coming.
The other two conversations regarded her relationship with
an empty fireplace (and a full head), and why she was not participating in
rhythmic body movements in a crowded room full of absolutely crazy people all
dancing (or at least that's what I hope it was) to the Black Keys's song,
lonely boy. All in all, not many of those conversations lasted more than a
couple sentences.
But somehow, she is one the closest human beings I have the
pleasure of calling friend.
"Hold up, hold up" you’re thinking, "how on
earth did this crazy manic weirdo stalker who is clearly fanaticizing on a made
up relationship with our amazing author, hack onto this blog to post this
creepy obsession" Now , now, dear reader. First, I deny being a stalker.
Also I do think I have good reason to pretend to be a good friend to the
author. And that reason is the internet.
See, me and the author have been chatting using Facebook
primary, sometimes Skype too, (not as often as I would have liked) for little
over a year now. We have seen each other
though some of the worst ups and downs in that short period. I have been with
her during her minor missteps, and she has been with me though my many, many,
many emotional hissy fits. Then promptly slapped me out of some of them, and
cheered me up though the rest. We know
each other well, (sometimes I think too well) and have a very good grasp of
each other's weak points and (in my case) more weak points. And that's amazing.
Think about it, we are so amazing that we can have deep,
meaningful relationships with people thousands of miles away, that, instantly,
we can communicate and talk to these people. I talk to the author nearly every
day, it's an odd day when we don't converse. She has become an necessary part of my day, and one of my dearest of
friends. It really makes me wonder about what is the basis of friendship? It
can't be presence, it's not hugs (as nice as they are), I suspect it's not even
words, but connection. What an amazing
and wonderful world we live in. Aren't we blessed, it blows my mind.
It's amazing then, that friendship, deep meaningful,
friendship can come from pixels?
And isn't it Ironic, that one of the closest friends I have,
lives that farthermost from me?
the always annoying
but hopefully entertaining,
Scooper.
Hello everyone, normal author back here! Just want to pop in with my thanksgiving point for today, which is precisely that which Scooper is talking about. For the friendships that the internet enables us to have, most particular this friendship. I have been very blessed through this friendship and am grateful God provided the internet that has enabled it to happen.
So, with Christmas on the 34th day from now, I give thanks for friendship and the care that God takes of me through them.
Wednesday, 20 November 2013
Thanksgiving # 36 - The end of exams!
So... I'm back!
I, unfortunately, missed the past couple of days. My mind has been focused on finishing my last two exams and now... I'M DONE!
Completely done.
IB no more!
It was an absolutely incredible feeling to walk out of the exam room for the last time.
It will be a less incredible feeling when I sign out next week, but, in the meantime, I'm going to enjoy the fact that I don't have to worry about school work any more.
I'm so grateful for the past 15 years of education, I'm also very grateful for the fact that I now get a break!
I'm grateful for the people who have come, some to leave again, others to stay (for a while at least) during those years.
I'm grateful for all the opportunities of growth I have had.
I'm grateful for the couple of hours I spent chilling with my friends after we finished our exams. I'm grateful for the awesome "yay! you're finished" gift I got from my parents - 9 Star Trek movies (completing my Star Trek movie collection) and one season of DS9 (also Star Trek). I am very thankful for the great food my family and I just ate in celebration!
And, most of all, I'm so grateful to God for bringing me through these past years and for the plans He has for my future.
I'm so excited for them! Please stick around as I learn new lessons, fumble things up and learn to love God more and more.
Are you all ready? Let's roll!
I, unfortunately, missed the past couple of days. My mind has been focused on finishing my last two exams and now... I'M DONE!
Completely done.
IB no more!
It was an absolutely incredible feeling to walk out of the exam room for the last time.
It will be a less incredible feeling when I sign out next week, but, in the meantime, I'm going to enjoy the fact that I don't have to worry about school work any more.
I'm so grateful for the past 15 years of education, I'm also very grateful for the fact that I now get a break!
I'm grateful for the people who have come, some to leave again, others to stay (for a while at least) during those years.
I'm grateful for all the opportunities of growth I have had.
I'm grateful for the couple of hours I spent chilling with my friends after we finished our exams. I'm grateful for the awesome "yay! you're finished" gift I got from my parents - 9 Star Trek movies (completing my Star Trek movie collection) and one season of DS9 (also Star Trek). I am very thankful for the great food my family and I just ate in celebration!
And, most of all, I'm so grateful to God for bringing me through these past years and for the plans He has for my future.
I'm so excited for them! Please stick around as I learn new lessons, fumble things up and learn to love God more and more.
Are you all ready? Let's roll!
Sunday, 17 November 2013
Thanksgiving #39 - Lazy Days and Games' Nights (a Sabbath day)
Yesterday, I had a lazy day.
My first real lazy day in a long time.
And it felt good.
It felt very, very good.
Admittedly, in the morning it was kind of forced on me due to me not feeling very well, but it was still very good.
Essentially, I spent the majority of my day lying on the sofa wrapped in my bedding and watching through Once Upon a Time with my sister. And not feeling guilty about it because I've only got 2 exams (one subject) left to go, and half a week to study for it.
In the evening, after dinner, I headed to church with the sister, where "just one hour" turned into three and a half hours of board games, laughter, chatting and cleaning with some friends.
Yesterday was, not just lazy, but relaxing.
And it has been obvious to all today, that I am much more relaxed than I have been. So many people have commented that I'm walking taller and look like a weight has been lifted from my shoulders.
I feel so much readier to face my day than I have been for a while. I wasn't intending to get up until 8, but at 7:24 I was up and ready to go.
Oh, the difference that taking a day off can make!
And this has been something that keeps coming up. This concept of "taking a break".
It's so easy not to do that. So easy to keep on going. Because, you know what? It's never finished.
The To-do list never gets shorter. Ever.
The world never slows down.
If anything, it just speeds up.
And up. And up.
And, I think I've spoken about this before, but it was pointed out to me, and I have since pointed it out to others.
So often we think that taking a break is selfish.
That just stopping and saying "no" to others is self-serving and unloving.
But... God commands us to take a rest.
I'll repeat that: God commands us to take a rest.
It isn't a mild suggestion. It isn't a "well... if you really must... but it would be so much better if you could..."
It is a command.
The Sabbath day... so many times He orders us to keep it Holy. It can even be found on the 10 Commandments.
Go, take a look. It's right there. Exodus chapter 20. Verse number 8. The fourth command: "remember the Sabbath day by keeping it Holy."
Now, I want to make myself very clear, I am by no means advocating doing no work at all. The Bible makes it so clear that laziness leads, quite rightfully, to ruin. It is dishonouring to God and foolish way to live.
But keeping the Sabbath honours God. Not just by the fact that you are taking a break, but by the work ethic and routine it helps us establish and maintain.
Look at Exodus 20: 9 - 10.
"Six days you shall labour and do all your work, but the seventh day is a Sabbath to the Lord your God."
Six days of work, than a day of rest so that you can be ready and able to do the next six days.
Is taking a rest selfish? No!
In fact, I would say that not taking the rest is selfish.
Seriously. What motivates someone to keep going?
A guilty conscience. We keep working because we don't like that sense of guilt, that feeling of "but it's going to keep piling up on me, I'm just going to have more to do later if I stop now." You get the picture?
We aren't really motivated by a desire to serve and love. We are motivated by the thought that it will be worse if we don't. Well, at least, that's the case for me.
So we push ourselves until the bags under ours eyes reach the floor, our bodies give way, and our emotions fly out all over the place, and start to maim and hurt other people.
Real loving thing, huh?
But resting... well, I've found it is not only easier, but also much more natural for me to reach out to others and see how they are doing. I can spend longer hours caring for the needs of other. But only after I've rested.
And do you know how important this Sabbath is to the Lord?
Important enough that the commands He gives Israel regarding farming and the care of the land also followed this pattern. For 6 years they were to grow crops and work the land. On the seventh year, they were to eat stored grain and leave the land alone. The land was to have a Sabbath every seventh year. And this was important enough that God punished them for not doing it by exiling them. It wasn't the only sin they were being punished for, but in Isaiah, it is mentioned multiple times, and He mentions it in the second half of Leviticus 26.
Important enough that the commands He gave Israel regarding the treatment of slaves a servants also followed this pattern. For 6 years a bondservant (slave) served their master, and on the seventh year they were freed, unless they chose to stay.
Yep. It's important.
But do you know what else the Exodus passage tells us about the Sabbath?
Well, it gives us an example, a model to follow, if you will. Which is this: "For in six days, the Lord made the heavens and the earth, the sea and all that is in them, but He rested on the seventh day. Therefore, the Lord blessed the Sabbath day and made it holy." (v 11)
Did you get that?
God doesn't just command a day of rest. He took one Himself. He built this pattern around what He Himself did.
I think that's a pretty good reason to be able to take a rest.
But, more than that, there's an even greater reason why we should do this.
All of God's Laws were laid down in order to set Israel apart. To bring God honour. To show the world that Israel served a Holy God.
Well, we still serve that same Holy God.
Shouldn't we be setting ourselves apart by following, to the best of our abilities, that pattern? That pattern of six days work and one day rest a week.
By being purposeful about taking time out to rest, to worship.
If you think about it, people in this world either over-rest and under-work, or they under-rest and over-work.
Be different. Make sure you get enough rest to do enough work to the best of your ability to the Glory of God.
Not so that you can do better, but so that God can do better through you.
Not so that you can be seen as great, but so that God can be seen as what He is: HOLY.
So, my thanksgiving point: I am grateful for rest, I am grateful that my God cares about my rest. And I am grateful for the day of rest I got yesterday.
My first real lazy day in a long time.
And it felt good.
It felt very, very good.
Admittedly, in the morning it was kind of forced on me due to me not feeling very well, but it was still very good.
Essentially, I spent the majority of my day lying on the sofa wrapped in my bedding and watching through Once Upon a Time with my sister. And not feeling guilty about it because I've only got 2 exams (one subject) left to go, and half a week to study for it.
In the evening, after dinner, I headed to church with the sister, where "just one hour" turned into three and a half hours of board games, laughter, chatting and cleaning with some friends.
Yesterday was, not just lazy, but relaxing.
And it has been obvious to all today, that I am much more relaxed than I have been. So many people have commented that I'm walking taller and look like a weight has been lifted from my shoulders.
I feel so much readier to face my day than I have been for a while. I wasn't intending to get up until 8, but at 7:24 I was up and ready to go.
Oh, the difference that taking a day off can make!
And this has been something that keeps coming up. This concept of "taking a break".
It's so easy not to do that. So easy to keep on going. Because, you know what? It's never finished.
The To-do list never gets shorter. Ever.
The world never slows down.
If anything, it just speeds up.
And up. And up.
And, I think I've spoken about this before, but it was pointed out to me, and I have since pointed it out to others.
So often we think that taking a break is selfish.
That just stopping and saying "no" to others is self-serving and unloving.
But... God commands us to take a rest.
I'll repeat that: God commands us to take a rest.
It isn't a mild suggestion. It isn't a "well... if you really must... but it would be so much better if you could..."
It is a command.
The Sabbath day... so many times He orders us to keep it Holy. It can even be found on the 10 Commandments.
Go, take a look. It's right there. Exodus chapter 20. Verse number 8. The fourth command: "remember the Sabbath day by keeping it Holy."
Now, I want to make myself very clear, I am by no means advocating doing no work at all. The Bible makes it so clear that laziness leads, quite rightfully, to ruin. It is dishonouring to God and foolish way to live.
But keeping the Sabbath honours God. Not just by the fact that you are taking a break, but by the work ethic and routine it helps us establish and maintain.
Look at Exodus 20: 9 - 10.
"Six days you shall labour and do all your work, but the seventh day is a Sabbath to the Lord your God."
Six days of work, than a day of rest so that you can be ready and able to do the next six days.
Is taking a rest selfish? No!
In fact, I would say that not taking the rest is selfish.
Seriously. What motivates someone to keep going?
A guilty conscience. We keep working because we don't like that sense of guilt, that feeling of "but it's going to keep piling up on me, I'm just going to have more to do later if I stop now." You get the picture?
We aren't really motivated by a desire to serve and love. We are motivated by the thought that it will be worse if we don't. Well, at least, that's the case for me.
So we push ourselves until the bags under ours eyes reach the floor, our bodies give way, and our emotions fly out all over the place, and start to maim and hurt other people.
Real loving thing, huh?
But resting... well, I've found it is not only easier, but also much more natural for me to reach out to others and see how they are doing. I can spend longer hours caring for the needs of other. But only after I've rested.
And do you know how important this Sabbath is to the Lord?
Important enough that the commands He gives Israel regarding farming and the care of the land also followed this pattern. For 6 years they were to grow crops and work the land. On the seventh year, they were to eat stored grain and leave the land alone. The land was to have a Sabbath every seventh year. And this was important enough that God punished them for not doing it by exiling them. It wasn't the only sin they were being punished for, but in Isaiah, it is mentioned multiple times, and He mentions it in the second half of Leviticus 26.
Important enough that the commands He gave Israel regarding the treatment of slaves a servants also followed this pattern. For 6 years a bondservant (slave) served their master, and on the seventh year they were freed, unless they chose to stay.
Yep. It's important.
But do you know what else the Exodus passage tells us about the Sabbath?
Well, it gives us an example, a model to follow, if you will. Which is this: "For in six days, the Lord made the heavens and the earth, the sea and all that is in them, but He rested on the seventh day. Therefore, the Lord blessed the Sabbath day and made it holy." (v 11)
Did you get that?
God doesn't just command a day of rest. He took one Himself. He built this pattern around what He Himself did.
I think that's a pretty good reason to be able to take a rest.
But, more than that, there's an even greater reason why we should do this.
All of God's Laws were laid down in order to set Israel apart. To bring God honour. To show the world that Israel served a Holy God.
Well, we still serve that same Holy God.
Shouldn't we be setting ourselves apart by following, to the best of our abilities, that pattern? That pattern of six days work and one day rest a week.
By being purposeful about taking time out to rest, to worship.
If you think about it, people in this world either over-rest and under-work, or they under-rest and over-work.
Be different. Make sure you get enough rest to do enough work to the best of your ability to the Glory of God.
Not so that you can do better, but so that God can do better through you.
Not so that you can be seen as great, but so that God can be seen as what He is: HOLY.
So, my thanksgiving point: I am grateful for rest, I am grateful that my God cares about my rest. And I am grateful for the day of rest I got yesterday.
Friday, 15 November 2013
Thankgsiving #41 - For Work and Rest and Safety
"They will not grow old as we that are left grow old,
age shall not weary them, nor the years condemn,
at the going down of the sun and in the morning
we will remember them.
Lest we forget."
They are familiar words. Words that most people in English speaking countries will have heard many times.
Words that can sometimes be so familiar that we forget just what they mean. We forget just what it is we are rememering.
Our school had our Remembrance Day ceremony today. I am ashamed to say that in the pressure and stress of the exams, I did not realise it was Remembrance Day until it was past.
So it was good to be able to have that moment of silence today and to commorate the memories and lives of service men and women who have given of themselves, whether it was their life or their health to the protection of their countries and their worlds.
As we had our moment of silence, which followed readings of "In Flanders Fields", "We are the Maimed" and, of course, "The Ode", I reflected on the words of prayer that we say at church quite regularly.
It is part of a prayer of thanksgiving, words that are often said by rote: "for life and health and safety, for work and rest and friendship".
"safety... work... rest".
I reflected on the wars that have raged and wars still being fought. I thought of those who died in battle, and of those who came home scarred emotionally and/or physically. I thought of the sacrfices they made to keep my country free and safe, to prevent fighting from ever reaching our shores, so that we may enjoy safety, work and rest. And I thought of the sacrifices they made to try to ensure that other countries, countries that otherwise would have nothing to do with us, enjoy the same freedoms.
I do not agree with war. I do not think killing is the way to go. And I am not particularly patriotic. But the older I get, the deeper my respect for our soldiers.
The more important it becomes to me to honour their memories. I may not know their names. I may not be connected to them in anyway, but they sacrficed themselves for people they would never meet, people whose names they would never know.
They are still sacrficing themselves for it. Because not ever country is as priviliged as mine. Not every country is able to enjoy work, rest and safety.
And, as the Rouse began to play, I breathed a prayer of thanksgiving.
I thanked God that I live in a country where I can work, where I can rest and where I know every measure is being taken to ensure my safety.
And I thanked God for those men and women who made it, and make it, possible.
That is today's thanksgiving point, on the 41st day before Christmas. The sacrfice of our militaries, and the privileges that came from it.
Lest we forget.
age shall not weary them, nor the years condemn,
at the going down of the sun and in the morning
we will remember them.
Lest we forget."
They are familiar words. Words that most people in English speaking countries will have heard many times.
Words that can sometimes be so familiar that we forget just what they mean. We forget just what it is we are rememering.
Our school had our Remembrance Day ceremony today. I am ashamed to say that in the pressure and stress of the exams, I did not realise it was Remembrance Day until it was past.
So it was good to be able to have that moment of silence today and to commorate the memories and lives of service men and women who have given of themselves, whether it was their life or their health to the protection of their countries and their worlds.
As we had our moment of silence, which followed readings of "In Flanders Fields", "We are the Maimed" and, of course, "The Ode", I reflected on the words of prayer that we say at church quite regularly.
It is part of a prayer of thanksgiving, words that are often said by rote: "for life and health and safety, for work and rest and friendship".
"safety... work... rest".
I reflected on the wars that have raged and wars still being fought. I thought of those who died in battle, and of those who came home scarred emotionally and/or physically. I thought of the sacrfices they made to keep my country free and safe, to prevent fighting from ever reaching our shores, so that we may enjoy safety, work and rest. And I thought of the sacrifices they made to try to ensure that other countries, countries that otherwise would have nothing to do with us, enjoy the same freedoms.
I do not agree with war. I do not think killing is the way to go. And I am not particularly patriotic. But the older I get, the deeper my respect for our soldiers.
The more important it becomes to me to honour their memories. I may not know their names. I may not be connected to them in anyway, but they sacrficed themselves for people they would never meet, people whose names they would never know.
They are still sacrficing themselves for it. Because not ever country is as priviliged as mine. Not every country is able to enjoy work, rest and safety.
And, as the Rouse began to play, I breathed a prayer of thanksgiving.
I thanked God that I live in a country where I can work, where I can rest and where I know every measure is being taken to ensure my safety.
And I thanked God for those men and women who made it, and make it, possible.
That is today's thanksgiving point, on the 41st day before Christmas. The sacrfice of our militaries, and the privileges that came from it.
Lest we forget.
Thursday, 14 November 2013
Thanksgiving #42 - Warm beds on cool mornings
I'll keep this one brief - but really, who isn't grateful for a warm bed to lie in when the mornings are cool?
Or a soft bed to sleep in when your muscles ache?
Or a bed that you can through all the covers off when it's warm?
But in the grand scheme of things, so few people actually have a soft bed with blankets they can vary according to season.
So today, I give thanks for my bed!
Or a soft bed to sleep in when your muscles ache?
Or a bed that you can through all the covers off when it's warm?
But in the grand scheme of things, so few people actually have a soft bed with blankets they can vary according to season.
So today, I give thanks for my bed!
Tuesday, 12 November 2013
God is a Holy God (and thanksging #44 - God is a loving God)
So, after my maths exam today, I popped down to the local Christian book shop. My intention was to pick up Warren W. Wiersbe's BE commentary on Isaiah in order to use it for my devotions. Unfortunately, the didn't have the Isaiah one in, so, instead, I picked up the one on Leviticus.
I decided that to do my devotions and then launch into study for my Biology exam tomorrow afternoon. I had just finished reading the introduction for the first chapter of the book (not the Bible book, the commentary book) when the first sentence of the next section arrested my attention:
"Contrary to what you may hear today in some sermons and popular religious songs, the emphasis in the Bible is on the holiness of God and not on the love of God."
I was, needless to say, I little surprised by that sentence. I re-read it a few times while thinking it through.
I realised the most surprising part of that sentence wasn't the fact that the Bible focuses on God's holiness more than His love, but the implications that this isn't how the church and Christian pop culture (if such a thing can be said) portrays it.
Then I realised it is true.
It's not that anything explicitly teaches that God's love is more central to the Bible and who God is than His holiness, but that it is implied through the focus of evangelical Christianity being on God's love and not on His holiness.
I have lost track of the number of talks I have heard emphasize that fact that we are sinful but God loves us and so He saves us, but I can count on one hand the number of talks I have heard that emphasize the reality of God's holiness.
And sure, God's holiness is implicit in the very definition of sin, but it is very, very, very rarely explicity discussed.
And this has some terrible ramifications to our faith and our attitudes towards salvation.
Just think, some of the most frequently asked questions about the Christian faith are "if God is so loving, why does He punish people?" and "what do you mean 'only one way to God'? That's awfully arrogant. There must be other ways." and "I'm better than them, surely God will save me?"
Anyone else seeing what is going on here?
Yes, it is true that God is loving, more than that, He is love, but in the rush to reassure the world that there is a solution to their problem (this love) we have failed to fully explain what our problem is.
Yes, we can explain sin. But is sin really so bad if we don't hold in our minds just who it is we're sinning against?
God's mercy and grace suddenly make a whole lot more sense when we realise just how holy He is. When we realise the extent of His Holiness.
And I'm not talking about the "holiness: an absence of sins", I'm talking about a holiness that is living and active righteousness.
God's holiness is not a negative, a lack of sin, but a postive, a presence of perfection, goodness and purity.
So, yeah, all of a sudden the fact that good enough is not actually good enough, and we deserve punishment and there is only one way to God make a lot more sense.
And, in fact, I would say it makes that last one "there is only one way" absolutely incredible.
And I can't help but wonder is this what we lose when our devotions shelves at our Christian bookshops are filled with comforting titles like "Hope for the Hurting" (which is good and true, but only part of the story)?
Have we lost this really, deep understanding of God's holiness?
I think we have. And I think the cost of that is we lose a true understanding of God's love. Of the absolute depth and purity of His Love and Mercy.
When we forget just how Holy God is, when we forget the extent of His Holiness, we start to feel entitled.
More than that, as Augustus H. Strong once said (Wiersbe quotes him) "Love is central in god, but Holiness is central in love."
So, my friends, don't forget God's love, don't do away with it, but let's bring back the focus and understanding of God's holiness. Let's seek the depths of God's heart by seeking an understanding of His holiness. A great place to start is your Bible!
And so, for my thanksgiving point, Weirsbe makes the comment that "Love without holiness would be a monstrous thing that could destroy God's perfect Law, while holiness without love would leave no hope for the lost sinner." I give thanks that God is a both a holy God, and a Loving God. And I give thanks for the salvation He us offered to us in His Love.
I decided that to do my devotions and then launch into study for my Biology exam tomorrow afternoon. I had just finished reading the introduction for the first chapter of the book (not the Bible book, the commentary book) when the first sentence of the next section arrested my attention:
"Contrary to what you may hear today in some sermons and popular religious songs, the emphasis in the Bible is on the holiness of God and not on the love of God."
I was, needless to say, I little surprised by that sentence. I re-read it a few times while thinking it through.
I realised the most surprising part of that sentence wasn't the fact that the Bible focuses on God's holiness more than His love, but the implications that this isn't how the church and Christian pop culture (if such a thing can be said) portrays it.
Then I realised it is true.
It's not that anything explicitly teaches that God's love is more central to the Bible and who God is than His holiness, but that it is implied through the focus of evangelical Christianity being on God's love and not on His holiness.
I have lost track of the number of talks I have heard emphasize that fact that we are sinful but God loves us and so He saves us, but I can count on one hand the number of talks I have heard that emphasize the reality of God's holiness.
And sure, God's holiness is implicit in the very definition of sin, but it is very, very, very rarely explicity discussed.
And this has some terrible ramifications to our faith and our attitudes towards salvation.
Just think, some of the most frequently asked questions about the Christian faith are "if God is so loving, why does He punish people?" and "what do you mean 'only one way to God'? That's awfully arrogant. There must be other ways." and "I'm better than them, surely God will save me?"
Anyone else seeing what is going on here?
Yes, it is true that God is loving, more than that, He is love, but in the rush to reassure the world that there is a solution to their problem (this love) we have failed to fully explain what our problem is.
Yes, we can explain sin. But is sin really so bad if we don't hold in our minds just who it is we're sinning against?
God's mercy and grace suddenly make a whole lot more sense when we realise just how holy He is. When we realise the extent of His Holiness.
And I'm not talking about the "holiness: an absence of sins", I'm talking about a holiness that is living and active righteousness.
God's holiness is not a negative, a lack of sin, but a postive, a presence of perfection, goodness and purity.
So, yeah, all of a sudden the fact that good enough is not actually good enough, and we deserve punishment and there is only one way to God make a lot more sense.
And, in fact, I would say it makes that last one "there is only one way" absolutely incredible.
And I can't help but wonder is this what we lose when our devotions shelves at our Christian bookshops are filled with comforting titles like "Hope for the Hurting" (which is good and true, but only part of the story)?
Have we lost this really, deep understanding of God's holiness?
I think we have. And I think the cost of that is we lose a true understanding of God's love. Of the absolute depth and purity of His Love and Mercy.
When we forget just how Holy God is, when we forget the extent of His Holiness, we start to feel entitled.
More than that, as Augustus H. Strong once said (Wiersbe quotes him) "Love is central in god, but Holiness is central in love."
So, my friends, don't forget God's love, don't do away with it, but let's bring back the focus and understanding of God's holiness. Let's seek the depths of God's heart by seeking an understanding of His holiness. A great place to start is your Bible!
And so, for my thanksgiving point, Weirsbe makes the comment that "Love without holiness would be a monstrous thing that could destroy God's perfect Law, while holiness without love would leave no hope for the lost sinner." I give thanks that God is a both a holy God, and a Loving God. And I give thanks for the salvation He us offered to us in His Love.
Monday, 11 November 2013
Some Reflections, One Resolution and Thanksgiving #45
So, between the wedding on Saturday, this awesome post by my friend Mel, the run of the mill jokes at school and the shows that I have on my list of things to watch following the completion of my exams (just one week left!), relationships, romance and love has been coming up a lot.
And I mean, a lot.
It seems like everywhere I look, people are falling in love (with the exception of Mel, who has made an awesome decision - go read that post! Also, you go, girl!) and starting or continuing romantic relationships.
Which is awesome and all, but it has got me thinking about that kind of thing. And what my attitude is going to be about it once I finish with high school forever!
One of the things I've realized, and I said as much at youth group on Friday, that the amount of romance I have been seeing has been making me less content with being single. Making it harder to celebrate the fact that at this moment in time, God has given me the incredible gift of singleness and easier to wonder why I don't have that special someone (which is silly seeing as how much of my life I have left!).
This question is made even more pertinent (the first one about my attitude) by the fact that I will soon be 18, which is the age I have always said I will start considering the possibility of dating.
Mel's post (if you haven't already - go read!) gave me a lot to think about.
Now, my starting attitude is slightly different to hers. I'm coming more from the it-would-be-nice-to-have-a-boyfriend-but-honestly-I-don't-need-or-particularly-want-one camp (yay for long words!). Still, that is something that could very easily change next year as I meet new guys. Plus, even coming from that camp, I still have moments with most of the guys I've come across where I stop and analyse whether or not I would want to date them (so when I say I wouldn't date someone, I honestly would not date them).
Still, what she was talking about was still challenging.
The question I then asked myself was: am I ready to consider being in a relationship?
After some reflection (it didn't take long) I decided that no, I wasn't.
Sure, it would be lovely to be in a relationship with a guy who I can hug when I'm having a rough day, or who'll come over and do random stuff with just because, and someone who can lead me and guide me closer to God. BUT, I am not yet ready for that.
See, the thing is, I'm not yet at that point where I am so deeply in love with God that He will remain the centre of my relationship and my life. At this point in time, it would be far too easy for me to start idolizing the guy and not my God.
And that is, for me, a big no-no.
God, and God alone, has the right to the centerpiece of my life. He, and He alone, as the right to be Master and Ruler of my heart.
Besides, He is awesome and wonderful and incredible, and why would I want to love anyone else more than Him?
As well as this, a secondary point, my character is not yet ready to act as the woman in a romance. I still have a lot of growth ahead of me before I am ready to be the kind of woman who can unconditionally love and support a man. Don't read that wrong - I'm not waiting to be perfect! I just now that at the moment, I am not ready for it.
So, I have decided on this:
Next year, I am planning to do Year 13, an awesome gap year program that involves Bible study and ministry. I am going to devote that year to developing my relationship with God.
There will be no development of romantic relationships in that year.
The focus will be on falling deeper in love with GOD and building friendships with the people I meet.
If any guy wants to date me, I'm sorry in advance to him (chances are, admittedly, slim), but the answer is no.
And I figure, if he is the right guy, or is serious about pursuing and caring for my heart, then he'll not only be willing to wait, but will also support me in my decision and be happy to just be my friend (should this scenario happen, I have some close girlfriends that I will ask to help keep me accountable to the boundaries that will be established).
The important thing for me next year, is to fall in love with God. To grow as His child and to bring Him honour.
The purpose is not to prepare myself for romance, rather, I have decided to abstain from romance in order to focus on the far more important Love of my Life.
And I ask all you who read this post to hold me accountable to this. To challenge me if a relationship starts to develop, to slap me if I ignore your challenge, and to be challenging me about my relationship with God. The last thing I want to do is get complacent!
At the end of next year, I'll probably revisit the question and decide whether I wish to keep abstaining from romance or will be open to the possibility of a relationship.
So check in with me then to find out!
Also, I've just realized that I haven't continued with the thought about contentment in singleness - being purposeful about being single will, I am certain, help me with it. Also, if I find myself getting too discontent, well, bye-bye romcoms for a while!
And now, on a completely unrelated note - my thanksgiving point! Christmas is on the 45th day from now!
So, today I am very thankful for the exams I sat. They had the potential to be absolutely devastating, and, praise the Lord, the weren't! Still my worst exams in this lot to date, but they were not devastating, which gives me great hope as they are the ones I feared the most (short of tomorrow morning's exam).
So, thank God that the exams were good and I was able to recall most of what I had learnt. It is such a weight off my shoulders! Only 6 left now!!
And I mean, a lot.
It seems like everywhere I look, people are falling in love (with the exception of Mel, who has made an awesome decision - go read that post! Also, you go, girl!) and starting or continuing romantic relationships.
Which is awesome and all, but it has got me thinking about that kind of thing. And what my attitude is going to be about it once I finish with high school forever!
One of the things I've realized, and I said as much at youth group on Friday, that the amount of romance I have been seeing has been making me less content with being single. Making it harder to celebrate the fact that at this moment in time, God has given me the incredible gift of singleness and easier to wonder why I don't have that special someone (which is silly seeing as how much of my life I have left!).
This question is made even more pertinent (the first one about my attitude) by the fact that I will soon be 18, which is the age I have always said I will start considering the possibility of dating.
Mel's post (if you haven't already - go read!) gave me a lot to think about.
Now, my starting attitude is slightly different to hers. I'm coming more from the it-would-be-nice-to-have-a-boyfriend-but-honestly-I-don't-need-or-particularly-want-one camp (yay for long words!). Still, that is something that could very easily change next year as I meet new guys. Plus, even coming from that camp, I still have moments with most of the guys I've come across where I stop and analyse whether or not I would want to date them (so when I say I wouldn't date someone, I honestly would not date them).
Still, what she was talking about was still challenging.
The question I then asked myself was: am I ready to consider being in a relationship?
After some reflection (it didn't take long) I decided that no, I wasn't.
Sure, it would be lovely to be in a relationship with a guy who I can hug when I'm having a rough day, or who'll come over and do random stuff with just because, and someone who can lead me and guide me closer to God. BUT, I am not yet ready for that.
See, the thing is, I'm not yet at that point where I am so deeply in love with God that He will remain the centre of my relationship and my life. At this point in time, it would be far too easy for me to start idolizing the guy and not my God.
And that is, for me, a big no-no.
God, and God alone, has the right to the centerpiece of my life. He, and He alone, as the right to be Master and Ruler of my heart.
Besides, He is awesome and wonderful and incredible, and why would I want to love anyone else more than Him?
As well as this, a secondary point, my character is not yet ready to act as the woman in a romance. I still have a lot of growth ahead of me before I am ready to be the kind of woman who can unconditionally love and support a man. Don't read that wrong - I'm not waiting to be perfect! I just now that at the moment, I am not ready for it.
So, I have decided on this:
Next year, I am planning to do Year 13, an awesome gap year program that involves Bible study and ministry. I am going to devote that year to developing my relationship with God.
There will be no development of romantic relationships in that year.
The focus will be on falling deeper in love with GOD and building friendships with the people I meet.
If any guy wants to date me, I'm sorry in advance to him (chances are, admittedly, slim), but the answer is no.
And I figure, if he is the right guy, or is serious about pursuing and caring for my heart, then he'll not only be willing to wait, but will also support me in my decision and be happy to just be my friend (should this scenario happen, I have some close girlfriends that I will ask to help keep me accountable to the boundaries that will be established).
The important thing for me next year, is to fall in love with God. To grow as His child and to bring Him honour.
The purpose is not to prepare myself for romance, rather, I have decided to abstain from romance in order to focus on the far more important Love of my Life.
And I ask all you who read this post to hold me accountable to this. To challenge me if a relationship starts to develop, to slap me if I ignore your challenge, and to be challenging me about my relationship with God. The last thing I want to do is get complacent!
At the end of next year, I'll probably revisit the question and decide whether I wish to keep abstaining from romance or will be open to the possibility of a relationship.
So check in with me then to find out!
Also, I've just realized that I haven't continued with the thought about contentment in singleness - being purposeful about being single will, I am certain, help me with it. Also, if I find myself getting too discontent, well, bye-bye romcoms for a while!
And now, on a completely unrelated note - my thanksgiving point! Christmas is on the 45th day from now!
So, today I am very thankful for the exams I sat. They had the potential to be absolutely devastating, and, praise the Lord, the weren't! Still my worst exams in this lot to date, but they were not devastating, which gives me great hope as they are the ones I feared the most (short of tomorrow morning's exam).
So, thank God that the exams were good and I was able to recall most of what I had learnt. It is such a weight off my shoulders! Only 6 left now!!
Sunday, 10 November 2013
Just a writing idea...
Hey, so, I love to write. I had a new idea for a story today, one about faith in even the most adverse of circumstances. And, as one naturally does when hit with a new idea for a book, I wrote the last few pages of the last chapter. So far, the only character I have named is the little girl, Ruth, because she is, to her mother, what Ruth is to Naomi in the Bible. A gift and a hope in times of extreme trials (the mother having been raped). Practically everything that can go wrong, does, and, through it all, she has to learn to trust in God's goodness.
Also, because Ruth is the only named character, everyone else is referred to as "the woman", "the man" and "the nurse". Sorry about that. In the final production, it will read a little more like a chapter in a novel, and a little less like a short story.
So, I was hoping I could share what I have written from you and get some feedback. A miracle does occur in these pages. It was just how the story happened in my mind, and I try not to force it too much, so I kept the miracle. And I am so glad I did!
Anyway, here it is. Please, please, please give me some feedback, either in the comments here or on Facebook.
Also, because Ruth is the only named character, everyone else is referred to as "the woman", "the man" and "the nurse". Sorry about that. In the final production, it will read a little more like a chapter in a novel, and a little less like a short story.
So, I was hoping I could share what I have written from you and get some feedback. A miracle does occur in these pages. It was just how the story happened in my mind, and I try not to force it too much, so I kept the miracle. And I am so glad I did!
Anyway, here it is. Please, please, please give me some feedback, either in the comments here or on Facebook.
The woman bent
over in the
little room, fist
pressed against her
lips, straining. Her
eyes were filled
with water, her
cheeks soaked with
it.
She screamed. A
blood-curdling, heart wrenching
scream. She straightened,
her eyes stared
wildly at nothing.
Her breath came
in short, ragged
puffs.
Nothing, nothing had
hurt as much
as this. Not
the rape, not
the discovery of
the pregnancy, not
the news that
her entire family
had been killed
in an accident.
No, nothing had
hurt as much
as watching the
doctors take her screaming
Ruth away from
her. Nothing hurt
as much as
hearing little Ruth
shrieking for Mama
and not being
able to run to her,
to hold her,
to tell her
everything was going
to be alright.
Or hearing those
words, those words
she had prayed
so desperately not
to hear. Those
words had completely
overturned her life.
“I’m sorry. There
was nothing we
could do.”
She collapsed against
the floor. Her
shoulders shook under
the force of
her sobs.
Everything was not
going to be
alright. Her Ruthie,
her precious, precious
Ruthie was dead.
Her precious, smiling
angel. The gift
that had made
everything bearable.
“Why?!” she screamed.
“Why, God, why?
Why have you
abandoned me? What
have I done
to deserve this?
You’ve taken my
entire family. Why take Ruth
as well? She
is the one dearest to
my heart. Why
take her? Why
take my daughter
from me? What
purpose does it
serve?”
She groaned. She
raised a trembling
hand to her
lips, squeezing her
eyes shut.
“The Lord gives.
The Lord takes.
And in all things, He
is good.” She
whispered the words,
forcing herself to
repeat them over
and over again.
Desperate for the
truth of them
to sink in.
“His grace is
unchanging. His love
is never ending.
Circumstances change, He does not.”
“Why, God, why?”
Isaac.
The name that
she would have
given Ruthie had
she been a
boy drifted through
her mind.
Isaac, laughter. An
impossible miracle boy
given to Sarah
and Abraham in
their old age.
Isaac, the fulfillment
of a promise.
Isaac, the hope,
the gift, the
promise.
Isaac, the one
God asked Abraham
to sacrifice.
She felt her
blood run cold.
Was that it?
Was that why?
“Did I love
Ruthie too much?
Was she taking
your place in
my heart?”
The tears started
running down her
face again. “Forgive
me, Father. Please,
forgive me. You
and you alone
are master of
my heart. It
kills, Daddy, it
kills that you
have taken my
daughter from me. I’ve never
felt pain this
intense. Please, teach
me to rely
on you, your
goodness and your
grace. Please, help
me bear this
pain. Help me
say good-bye. Help
me be content
and joyous in
even this dark
times. Because it
is so hard.
So hard to
be joyful right
at the moment.
And, Daddy, look
after my little
girl, please?”
She buried her
face in her
hands and didn’t
look up when
the door opened.
She didn’t care
who it was.
A second later,
strong arms wrapped
themselves around her.
“I am so,
so sorry,” the
rough, choked voice
whispered into her
ear.
She pressed into
him. He was
here. Of course
he was. He
always was. She
wrapped her arms
around him, crying
into his shoulder.
When she finally
pulled away, he
gently wiped her
tears away, the
wetness of his
eyes and the
gentleness of his
smile caused her
breath to catch.
Thank you,
God, for this
man.
“Come on, let’s
get you home.
I’ll cook some
dinner for us.”
He gripped her
hands and tugged
her to her
feet. Numbly, she
nodded, and allowed
him to lead
her away.
They were nearly
at the car
when someone shouted
her name out behind them.
They both turned
to see a
nurse, one of
their church friends,
running after them.
He stopped, breathing
heavily.
“What, what is
it?” she asked.
“You are never
going to believe
this.” He gasped.
“None of us do, but…”
he bent over,
heaving for breath.
“Yes, what?” “Come
on, out with
it!”
“It’s just… it’s
Ruth. She alive…
and perfectly healthy.”
“What?” she stumbled
back against the
car, gripping the
hand of the
man beside her whose
stunned expression matched
her emotions.
“She’s alive and
there is absolutely
no sign of
any kind of
illness. Nothing whatsoever.”
“How is that even
possible?” she heard
his voice from
a distance. Her
mind spun and
she stared in
the direction of
the hospital. The
words from Isaac’s
story whirled in
her head. “Do not
lay a hand
on the boy,”
he said. “Do
not harm him.
Now I know that you
fear God, because
you have not
withheld your own
son, your only
son.”
“O, God, O,
God, thank you!
Thank you!” she
yelled, laughter and
tears spilling from
her. “Thank you,
thank you!” she
breathed in deeply
before rounding on
the nurse. “Where
is she?”
“They’re moving her
to a room.
They want her
to stay the
night for observation.”
With another shriek
of joy, she started
to run. Running
back into the
hospital. People were
staring, but she
didn’t care.
Her Ruthie was
alive. God had
given her back.
She turned into
a corridor, and
there she was,
at the far
end. Ruth, her
precious, precious Ruth.
“RUTH!” she yelled.
Her daughter looked
around and saw
her, a smile
lighting up her
face.
“Mama!” she
called back.
The woman ran
down the corridor
and collapsed in
front of her
daughter. Her breath
caught in her
throat again as
she stared into
the face of her daughter.
The last time
she’d seen it,
just hours ago,
it had been
tight and sickly
white. There had
been pain pinching
at her face
and fear in
her eyes. Now,
she was a
healthy pink and
smiling as though
she’d just gotten
home from the
park.
Was it possible?
Was it really,
really possible?
“Oh Ruth!” weeping
all over again,
she gathered her
daughter up in
her arms and
rocked her back
and forth. “Truly,”
she whispered into
her daughter’s neck.
“Truly the Lord
gives, the Lord
takes, but in
all things He
is good.”
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