"and how does that breathing thing go again?" I sent the message off, slumping forward over the bathroom vanity, forehead pressed to the mirror. It had been a very, very long day.
"We did mediation today," came the answer. "Do it with me... breathe in... and out... and in..."
I chuckled, relaxing in the humour. In and out... that's all it took. In with the good stuff... out with the bad...
In and out...
Simple.
So why is it so hard?
Why do the mounting pressures of assignments due and looming exams to cause the breath to go ragged, the heart to skip beats, the mind to spew?
Why do the long days and short weeks cause the breath to stutter and falter, out before it was even in?
Why does it feel like I'm scaling Mt Everest, less and less life-giving oxygen available for my lungs the more I climb the mountains?
Why is it that the less I breathe the more the words I wouldn't even think when I can breathe come out of my mouth
And at times I'm driven to my knees gasping for breath and I have to remember that the Holy Spirit is the air I breathe. That I need to remember to slow down and let Him fills my lungs, cleaning me of the foul words, the harsh thoughts, the bitter actions.
There are nights when all I can do is sink into my bed, face damp and encrusted with salt and just let Him do the breathing for me.
Just in... and out... in... and out...
In with the good, the pure, the righteous, the Reality of Daughter-ship, the Promise of Heaven, the Assurance of Victory, the Gift of Grace, the Healing of Humility, the Peace of Patience.
Out with the ugly, impure, the unrighteous, the Lust, the Greed, the Self-Centredness, the Lie of Imperfect, the Curse of the Swearword, the Trap of Anger.
In... and out... in... and out...
On and on because there is always so much Ugly to breathe out... and so much more Beautiful breathe out... until the end, when I breathe out for the last time and wake up in Heaven...
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